Yea, so I missed a week. Sorry about that. I totally left y'all (the two or three readers out there...!) hanging on the "word of the week" last week. I think I needed a little longer to contemplate the whole WITH thing. That pesky little preposition is more complicated than it seems. Sometimes it seems like a four-letter-word in the worst sense. Maybe it is because I pride myself on being fiercely independent when, in reality, I need people. I need God. And at the same time, I have this not-so-great-or-holy desire to go it alone. Me thinks I am more stubborn than independent most of the time.
I like to think that I am relatively independent and somewhat adventurous. A quick look back on my life will show you that I am not afraid to embark on something new. I am proud of that fact. It also takes me forever to take that first step. I fight back fear every step of the way. Ironically, another look back on my life will reveal that some of the best decisions I have ever made were made with a somewhat spontaneous leap-of-faith (what can I say...I will always be somewhat cautious).
All of this and a couple of conversations with people over the past week have led me to the new word of the week. The word this week is: EMBRACE. I am thinking of this word in the sense of acceptance, peace, and surrender. You can define it however you like in the week ahead, but I am thinking about it in this way. We need to make peace with ourselves, surrender to who we are instead of the idealized version of ourselves. This doesn't mean we use who we are as an excuse not to grow. It means accepting our weaknesses and considering that they might actually be strengths, too. It means taking a long look at ourselves and saying with God that what He made and what I am becoming is good. Like my mom always quotes, "God doesn't make screw-ups!"
I am a very quirky, sometimes clutzy, deeply loving, wonderfully awkward, randomly adventurous, slightly spacy, always analytical, exceptionally nerdy woman. I can be impatient at times, especially with myself. I am a mess, but God's grace is making me new everyday. I am learning to EMBRACE me...all of me. It is quite liberating. You should try it. :)